Chloe post: Things that Make me Happy aka First Work in Haiku

When the Brown Man reads
science or Blonde Lady sings
Eating my burp cloth

Playing with Mommy
Sleeping, snuggling with Daddy
Eating my burp cloth

Seeing my mobile
Or parents' happy faces
Eating my burp cloth

Mommy Gets 34 Minutes on the Naughty Step

So, yesterday, I was rushing to get home and threw the diaper bag over one shoulder and bent down to pick up Chloe and my cell phone came flying out of the bag, over my other shoulder and bonked her on the head. IT WAS HORRIFIC. She wailed the same "oh my God, I'm in pain, what is happening, oh my GOD" scream that she wailed when she got her vaccinations. IT WAS HORRIFIC. So, I tried to call the pediatrician to find out what to do with my beautiful baby and her black and blue goose egg and no one answered so I figured, "the pediatrician's office is right around the corner from my office, we're going!" and off we went like the freakin' tasmanian devil and as soon as the elevator door opened in front of me, I realized "I'm about to be THAT Mom. That lunatic who overreacts. I'm about to be her." And so, I rushed forward, embraced my fate and began babbling like a lunatic. The receptionist said "so you don't have an appointment?" NO, I DON'T AS I'VE JUST BONKED MY KID ON THE HEAD. JUST NOW. 5 MINUTES AGO. NO APPOINTMENT. So, she got some nurses to come out and look at her and Chloe smiled at them and giggled and blew bubbles and proved that yes, indeed, I AM that crazy overreacting Mom.

And when you are bad, Super Nanny makes you sit on the naughty step for the number of minutes that matches your age. So, I earned 34 minutes.

Seriously, thank God she was ok. I know - bumps on the head happen... but until yesterday, they hadn't happened to MY kid. I spent much of the evening just staring at her. Ed kept saying that it was an accident and not to worry and I know he's right, but of all the things I am, my favorite is being Chloe's Mom... and yesterday, I really put myself out of the running for Mom of the Year.

Chloe Post: Don't Boil the Baby!

It.is.hot.

Very.very.hot.

Just because the pediatrician told the Blonde Lady that babies can't wear sunblock until they are six months old, she has me dressed in long sleeves and long pants. SHE, of course, is sporting short sleeves and a skirt. No fair!

It's a million degrees outside and THE BABY had to wear a hat! A hat!

Just wait until I can talk. Just wait, Blonde Lady.

Pay it Forward - Freepeats.org

So, in the spirit of my post last week about Mommies laying down the judgment and supporting each other, I thought I would share about an awesome site that has Mommies and Daddies from all over the place helping each other out. Freepeats.org is a fantastic resource! There are message boards for 53 different cities where parents post what they need and what they need to get rid of - we're talking clothes, formula coupons, furniture, gear, all sorts of stuff.

Doesn't Chloe look comfortable in her little Graco walker up there (even though her feet don't touch the floor)? Yeah, that was free. Along with a high chair. All it cost me was the time to go and get it, a little bit of gas, and some time to clean it all. I've also posted to give away items that didn't work for us and it's a super cool way of keeping the items moving through BabyDom without giving Babies R Us ALL of your money.

I joined the site for free when Saving with 6 ABC sent out a message about it, but it's only $4.95 for a lifetime membership. I give it thumbs up. And so would Chloe if she knew how.

Just for kicks, here's another picture from yesterday... so you can see her cute outfit. This is one I bought on impulse, thinking, "I can't imagine when she'll be big enough to wear it, but I can't wait." And here she is.

3 Months Old

Today, Chloe is three months old!! I can hardly believe it. She has started sleeping through the night, rolling over (a bit) and she's "talking" and smiling all the time! Like right now - she should be napping, but instead she's talking to herself and the little animals hanging above the PakNPlay. I'm sure my office mates are enjoying the hell out of that. LOL

Anyway, she's just fantastic (knock wood) and we're so lucky!

Here are a few more photos from this week:

Chloe Post: A rose by any other name

Mostly, Mommy calls me "Muppet," but lately she has started calling me "Buddha Baby." Daddy calls me "Buddy" and Pop-Pop has started calling me "Jaws" (because I have such robust cheeks). Do you think they all missed the birth announcement? My name is C-H-L-O-E spells CHLOE. Sheesh.

The (Emotional) Cost of Formula

I had planned to breastfeed. I read the books, investigated the scary looking pump, and bought nursing bras. When it turned out that I was unable to produce anywhere near enough milk to feed Chloe, I was devastated... which honestly surprised me as there was a good chance (due to a past medical situation) that I wouldn't be able to exclusively breastfeed. So, I knew this was a distinct possibity and had spent some time prepping myself for it. But, I had to constantly remind myself that giving her formula does not make me a bad mother. I took pills for a month to try to up my prolactin levels and for 6 long weeks, I pumped anywhere from 4-8 times a day (I was slacking toward the end there) and gave her any little bit that I had. Deciding to stop pumping my miniscule amount of milk was another tough internal battle.

Now, Chloe is fed extensively on formula and mostly it's fine... well, it's entirely fine with her - she's well-fed and very happy. I'm the one that's mostly fine... I'm happy that my muppet is happy and I won't lie - there's a lot of convenience associated with using formula. But, every time I whip out a bottle in public, I feel myself start to get defensive... regardless of whether or not someone says something to me or not. When someone asks me if I am breastfeeding, I always feel like I need to tell them my whole story rather than simply saying "No." And then I guiltily remember that before being in this boat, I have judged (silently, to myself) other mothers for their choices.

It's like the day care vs. nanny vs. stay at home mom debate. Everyone is completely convinced that their side of the debate is the only right one and that those that go an opposite way are some how not trying hard enough... which is bull. We're all trying hard enough.

I think all of this is born out of the fact that we are actually spending most of the time judging ourselves. It's like moms have to lash out against someone doing it differently so they don't have the time to question whether or not they're the ones screwing it up.

So, I was thinking this morning how cool it would be if we all decided that we would get off this merry-go-round and stop judging ourselves and each other.

And then another thought occurred to me: we should take a lesson from the Daddies because I don't think men do this... to themselves or to each other.

I remember very clearly the moment I realized I was producing almost no milk and I held off on crying until Diane left. Ed looked at me and he said "What's wrong? I don't understand - this is all ok - we now know how to feed her! We can move forward with confidence."

What it comes down to is this: Ed doesn't understand why we should get upset that things didn't go as planned because as it turns out, we have a daughter who is beautiful and healthy and happy and well-nourished. And I've decided he's right.

Rainy days and Mondays

remember how last week, i was all "working mommies get it done!" blah, blah. who was i kidding? i mean, other than myself. lmao

Chloe Post: Hi, Mom-Mom and Pop-Pop

The Blonde Lady and Brown Man took me to visit Mom-Mom and Pop-Pop tonight and we had such a good time! They were eating a dinner that smelled really yummy, but they wouldn't let me have any. :(

That's ok, I had a lot of fun anyway. My favorite parts were snuggling with Mom-Mom and taking a nap and watching the Sixers game with Pop-Pop. He is the tallest person ever! Mommy says that next to him I look even tinier than I really am.



We visited for a long time and they said that they are looking forward to seeing me at my christening in Sea Isle City. All of my big people will be there - I can't wait!!

Baby Got... Inappropriate Lyrics

So, remember the episode of Friends when Rachel was scandalized by Ross singing Baby Got Back to Emma to make her smile? Well, my theory is that babies really do like this tune because when that new BK commercial for SpongeBob came on, Chloe laughed. Clearly, I'm not going to sing about a lewd guy who gets "sprung" to my child, so in true Singing Mommy style, I made up my own lyrics:

I like
Chloe Jean
and I cannot lie.
You other brothers can't deny
that when a baby walks in
with an itty bitty nose and round cheeks* in your face, you get
HAPPY.

She loves it; my husband thinks I'm nuts = all is right with the world.

*I mean FACIAL cheeks, you sickos.

Off topic: here's a shot from my cellphone of Chloe in the office yesterday:

Move Over Beyonce

Well, it was bound to happen.

I sing songs to Chloe all.the.livelong.day about anything that pops into my head at any given moment. Some of these songs are returning: the burping song, the drooling song, the going to the store song. But, many of them are just designed to get us thru the moment and are largely consisting of gibberish like "Chloe is a good girl and Mommy surely loves her. MOMMY SURELY DOES!"

So, yesterday, I got out of the car still singing to the baby who was still strapped in her car seat and onlookers stared at me like the lunatic I must look like.

I can't wait for the first time my boss asks me for a document and I present her with a chorus of "Mary needs to check her email email email. Mary needs to check her email oh she does."

Mommy Post: Working

As many loyal readers will know, I was really nervous about returning to work, but so far everything has been going really well. Since Chloe's preschool spot wasn't open as planned, she has been coming to the office with me. We're getting into a routine and I work my little buns off during her nap times. At times, it seems a little bit challenging, but for the most part, it's good. I thought I would feel really run-down and stressed, but instead I feel pretty happy. I love my office so much more with her in it. And the fact that she doesn't sleep continuously means that I'm forced to be as productive as I can when she does. I'm feeling in touch with my job and in touch with my daughter and it's really ok. Of course, this is day 3. Let's see how the rest of the week goes before I throw a parade in my own honor.

But, I guess my message here is: it can be done. Working Mommies figure it out. I need a t-shirt that reads: "Working Mommies Get it DONE."

Chloe Post: Working

So, the blonde one has started bringing me to this weird building where she plays on the computer and talks on the phone all day. I'm not really sure what's going on, but she and Aunt Mel put together this rocking Pak n Play for me. It's practically a home away from home.

Back to Work

Well, Chloe and I survived our first day in the office! With the day care center not having her spot when they thought they would, Chloe gets to come to work with Mommy each day. I have mastered the art of holding and feeding her with the left arm and hand while using the right to respond to email. So far, so good. LOL

Baby's First Easter

We had quite the busy Easter weekend - had to live it up before Mommy goes back to work on Monday!

Friday, Chloe and I had a yummy lunch with Aunt Diane. Chloe looked so cute in the bunny outfit that Di bought for her:





Saturday, Aunt Diane and Uncle John invited us over and Chloe got to know her Godfather:


On Sunday, the Easter Bunny brought Chloe this cool toy:



And then we went to Aunt Barb and Uncle Chris's house to have Easter dinner with them, Mike, and Nik. Here's Chloe with Nik:


Happy Easter, everyone!!!

Love,
Heather, Ed, and Chloe

Chloe Post: Meeting More Family

Last night, Mommy and Daddy took me to meet Daddy's Great Aunt (my Great Great!), Big Mommy, and Daddy's sister: my Aunt Maia. They both gave me lots and lots of kisses and told me how much they love me! Here we are:

Chloe Post: Ladies Lunching

Last week, Mommy took me to the Springfield Mall for lunch and shopping with my Great Aunt Joanne and second cousins, Samantha and Patti Anne. Everybody gave me really nice presents and lots of kisses. Sam fed me a bottle and held me a lot since it was the first time she met me! When I was riding in my stroller, Aunt Joanne wouldn't let Mommy push it because she wanted to take care of me! We had such a nice day together - Mommy couldn't believe how fast the day went. Mommy and I will miss these little outings when she goes back to work, so we have to enjoy them now. After we left Springfield, Mommy and I went to Target where we accidentally stole an air purifier for Daddy. But, Mommy says that's a story for another day.

A note from Mommy: Ed and I can't believe how fast Chloe is changing every day. We've had two exciting milestones this weekend. The first came when we got her mobile set up on her bassinet. She is utterly captivated by the moving animals and likes to "talk" to them as they rotate around her head. The second came yesterday when we went to the little pub on the corner for an early dinner. Ed fed her a bottle and then put her down in the stroller with a pacifier. At some point we looked over and realized that she was spitting out the paci and then using both hands to shove it back in her mouth. Sometimes, she wouldn't remember to let go and would pull it right back out again. Sometimes, she had it completely set. She did it over and over and over again, practicing. She was completely oblivious to us watching her and cheering her on.