Chloe and Mommy - A Conversation

Mommy: Good morning, Chloe.

Chloe: Good morning, Mama.

Mommy: How are you doing today?

Chloe: I am well, thank you. I had a very nice evening with Daddy last night while you were at card club. We watched the new Star Trek movie and spread my toys all over the living room floor. Cleaning up toys is illogical.

Mommy: So I noticed. And what is it that you are doing right now?


Chloe: I am drumming. Daddy got out this humidifier and plugged it in for five seconds before I tried to climb it. Then he put it back in the box and left it here. That was months ago and after a certain point of time, it transformed. It is no longer a humidifier, but rather has morphed into a drum set.

Mommy: That's an interesting perspective. I might have said that Daddy left this humidifier on the floor several months ago in his ongoing attempt to kill me slowly, but you are of the opinion that he intended to leave it there so that it could transform into a musical instrument for you.

Chloe: Yes. Daddy and I have a long-standing agreement about such things.

Mommy: I see.

Mommy: You know, Chlo, to change subjects, you look quite cute today.

Chloe: Well, thank you for noticing... and for the new spring clothes and accessories. They help me to look my best... but you know that this barrette is GONE the minute you turn around, right?

Mommy: Why? Don't you want to look pretty, Chloe? Pretty girls wear barrettes.

Chloe: Don't think you can try to manipulate me just because you've started watching the "Real Housewives of New York."

Mommy: Speaking of, I am *totally* Team Jill.

Chloe: Me, too. Originally, I wasn't sure, because the Countess makes me want to vomit, but that Bethenny is trashy. She needs to get to steppin'.

Mommy: Word.