Yay! Mommy's Home!

Amber: She was gone FOREVER!

Chloe: It was only a few days.

Amber: It felt like forever.

Chloe: That's because Daddy made us clean so much.

Amber: I hate to clean.

Chloe: Me, too, sister.  Me, too. 

Amber: Where was Mommy?

Chloe: I don't know.  She said she had to go out of town for work.  But, I worked with her on Monday and so she should have taken me.

Amber: Sounds boring.

Chloe: Because cleaning is so exhilarating?

Amber: Good point.

Chloe: But, now she's home.  Saturday was so awesome!  We went to the park and she got us French Fries and we tried to see the Pirates, but they were too 'cary so we had to leave and then I pretended to drive the car video game at the movies and...

Amber: ...And I was introduced to Subway.

Chloe: All good stuff. We missed you, Mommy!

Easter!

Chloe: Wow! The Easter Bunny hooked us up! We got the bunny movie, an age-appropriate musical, matching shoes, eggs, and I got a Tink and you got a new baby!

Amber: THERE'S CANDY IN THESE EGGS!

Gardening and Snacks

Chloe: I love gardening!

Amber: I love eating dirt!

A Review of the Colonial Plantation Easter Egg Hunt

Amber: What's all this? Why are you wearing a tu-tu on a farm?

Chloe: The Easter egg hunt was right after dance class...

Amber: And you're telling me you wouldn't have been wearing a tu-tu anyway?

Chloe: I didn't say that.

Amber: Right. So what were you doing?

Chloe: Mommy and I went to Colonial Plantation to go to the Easter Egg Hunt and then we visited the farm.

Amber: Snoozefest. Glad she didn't wake me up from my nap for that... anyway, proceed. Tell us all about it. Yawn.

Chloe: Here I am, being really patient that we had to wait 40 minutes even though the website said we were supposed to be prepared for an 11am start. Mommy was very proud of me.

Chloe: Here I am, finding one of the three eggs I managed to get. Mommy said that she wouldn't be one of those freaky mothers who guarded eggs for her kids and that she wasn't willing to get arrested.

Chloe: Here I am, being really cool about the fact that I got crap. Mommy told me on the way home that she was really proud of the way I conducted myself.

Chloe: Honestly, the best part was chilling at the farm itself, despite the fact that everyone who worked there seemed annoyed that there were children present. At an Easter Egg Hunt.

I loved these goslings and the horse and the sheep and the pigs and the poop. Mommy said poop is not an animal, but honestly, there was so much of it, that it should be. Plus, I did not know that animals poop. So that was really interesting to learn. And to discuss. LOUDLY.

Chloe: Here I am, petting this sweet little calf who was much more pleasant than his handler.

Mommy and I also enjoyed the sheep and the house tour. I was afraid of the 'pinning wheels because of Sleeping Beauty, but Mommy said it was okay. She touched one! I told her someone would get her, but she said it was okay. I really liked seeing the kitchen and learning about how they cooked INSIDE THE WALL. Mommy said she was impressed with my good behavior and how interested and engaged I was in the whole thing. Then, when Mommy said it was time to go, we left. She was astonished that I didn't try to steal a gosling or something. We finished up in the very disappointing gift shop where someone else was rude to us.

Overall, thumbs up - loved the animals, loved the house, loved the well, loved the oven, loved the poop.

Mommy's Review: I won't say that this sucked outright because it was a beautiful day and Chloe and I enjoyed hanging out together. But, the hunt was poorly organized, every person who worked there seemed annoyed to be working a kids' event (one even said so out loud) and I left thinking that they should have just mailed me an invoice for the eight bucks as a fundraising drive. But, the best thing about the experience was Chloe's behavior and that is never true lately, so I'll take it. But, seriously, Colonial Plantation? Be nice or go home.

Happy Freakin' Easter

Amber: I HATE THIS! MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY!!!!!

Chloe: I am so mad at you, Mommy!

Amber: COME GET ME!!!!! MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY!!!

Chloe: I don't know why I'm mad, but I am MAD! MAD AT YOU! WORST MOTHER EVER!

Amber: THIS BUNNY IS NOT NATURAL!!!!!!!!!!

The Joy that is Italian Night

Amber: This is AWESOME! It's like a meal AND a game.

Chloe: Yeah, Mommy always gives us macaNOni and other small pastas, but Daddy lets us have his spahheady. And he even lets us suck it in like a straw, with stuff flapping all around.

Amber: It makes Mommy's head spin around - that's part of the game!

Amber: What, are you a rock star, now?

Chloe: I sure am.

Amber: Well, I am performance art. If Lady Gaga can wear meat, I can wear spahheady.

Bad Behavior Does Not Motivate ANYONE to Fill Your Easter Baskets

Chloe: Ok, Amber, here's the plan: I'll keep terrorizing Mommy and you start pulling everything out of her purse. Maybe chew on some stuff.

Amber: On it.

Chloe: Great. I'll keep screaming and trying to run away.

Amber: I'll handle bursting into tears in regular intervals and shrieking like a banshee.

Chloe: Cool. If we keep it up, we'll have that woman drunk by bedtime.

Note from Mommy: By the end of our time in the mall on Saturday, strangers were walking up to ask me if I was ok. I am personally amazed that our civilization continues. How does anyone live past the age of three?

Pop-Pop: The Task Master

Amber: Here, a ball.

Chloe: Thanks, Amber. But, Pop-Pop is trying to teach me to use my bike.

Amber: You have to pedal.

Chloe: Thanks, genius. It's not as easy as it looks.

Amber: Whatevs.

Chloe: I could just put my feet on the floor, but Pop-Pop keeps catching me.

Amber: Yeah, he's tough.

Chloe: This is better.

Amber: Totally.